As a young child, I have learned in Sunday School that Jesus loves me. And I believed it with all my heart.
During my teens, I’ve lost my identity – my identity as God’s precious child and my parent’s beloved daughter.
It dragged me into the lie that I am not loved. I was very critical and I hated myself. I believed that I was beyond forgiveness. There was a time when I did everything to correct my wrongdoings. But it seems that no one can see the effort that I was putting in. I feel shunned by the people I care about greatly.
My desire to be accepted and loved resulted in compromising my values. I struggled with self-loathing, insecurity, depression, and suicidal thoughts. And during these times I clung to the only friends that I could trust with my brokenness. They were the hundred of notebooks that served as my journal.